SBWblog Archives

Getting to Know You
by Alicia Fry, LMSW*

First, I knew you by your diseases.
You were arthritis, Alzheimer’s, and spinal stenosis,
Hypertension, diabetes, and osteoporosis.
You were laugh lines and liver spots,
Wrinkles and resignation.
You were everything I dreaded.

Next, I came to know you by your devices.
You were four-pronged canes and walkers, pacemakers and grab bars.
You were hearing aids and bifocals, commodes and large-size diapers.
You were me in forty years.

Then, I knew you by your services.
You were Meals on Wheels and home care, Access-a-Ride and Medicaid.
You were client, recipient, patient.
Disabled, impaired, dependent, incontinent.
You were loss, despair, and death.

I came to know you by your experiences.
You were Ralph, the World War II vet, and Pearl who marched with Dr. King.
You were Minnie the milliner, and Peter the artist.
You were Sarah, post-Auschwitz, with a number tattooed on your forearm.
You were my Grandpa, my Nana, my Great Uncle Henry.
You were every old person I ever loved.

Now, I know you by your essences.
You are survivor, sojourner, and troubadour.
Sweetheart and scholar, lover and leader, teacher and timekeeper.
You are old faded photos, and diary-pressed flowers,
Mothballs and memories, mistakes and misgivings.
You are dreams deferred, and dreams realized.
You are yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
You are you, you are us, you are me.

*Gerontological Social Work Practice Fellow
Social Work Supervisor of SNAP Case Management

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